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Oi, mateys, gather ‘round, savvy? Me, Captain Jack Sparrow, been ponderin’ ‘bout them sex escorts lately—y’know, them lasses an’ lads fer hire. Ain’t no stranger to a good romp, but this? This be a different beast, arr! Watched “Children of Men” again—best flick ever, says I—got me thinkin’ deep, like. In that world, no babes born, humanity’s dyin’, an’ here we be, payin’ fer a tumble like it’s grog on tap. “We are not finished!”—that’s what Theo yells, right? Makes ye wonder if we’re just chasin’ tail to feel alive, eh?

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But then, back to reality. I get a text from Luca. He’s having second thoughts about the condo. I’m like, “No, no, no! You can’t do this to me!” I’m pacing up and down Via Roma, talking to myself like a crazy person. “Just close the deal, man!”