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About Turin

I’m into *Spirited Away*, tho. Best flick ever. Chihiro’s lost, tryna find her way—kinda like me on Tinder. Sex-dating’s a maze, yo. You’re dodgin’ creeps, hopin’ for a vibe. “No face, no trace,” I mutter, scrollin’. Like No-Face in the movie, some folks just needy. Offerin’ gold—or dick pics—thinkin’ it’s a flex. Nah, son, chill.

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Please note: This show contains themes of violence and sexual assault and is intended for mature audiences,18+ only. Each ticket includes a seat.

Then I hit up the local café on Piazza Aldo Moro. Best espresso ever! I’m talking liquid gold, people. I down it like it’s water. But then, this old dude starts chatting me up about the history of Valenzano. I mean, I love history, but c’mon, I didn’t sign up for a lecture! He’s going on about the ancient ruins and how Valenzano was once a Roman settlement. I’m nodding, but my brain’s like, “Dude, I just want my coffee!”

Wine, Dine and Unwind At Valenzano Winery This Weekend