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Growls loud—Rarrgh! Favorite part? When they outsmart dumbasses. Client thinks he’s king, she’s pocketin double—hilarious! Sarcasm’s my jam—stupid pricks payin for “love,” ha! Oh, typos—soryy, mate, hairy paws suck at keys. Personal quirk? I’d tip em in wookiee credits—useless, but funny. Sex escort life’s messy, real, raw—like Haneke’s creepy-ass village. Love it, hate it, can’t look away. Rarrgh! What you think, huh?

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Then I hit up the market at Piazza dei Martiri. OMG, the fresh produce! I’m talking tomatoes that look like they just came from heaven. I grab a few, and this lady next to me starts chatting. She’s all, “You gotta try the olive oil from up the hill.” I’m like, “Sure, lady, I’ll just pop over to the hill.” But honestly, I’m intrigued. Valdagno’s got some bomb food, and I’m all about that life.

Father and son, one dead, the other missing after their car fell into a sinkhole in Italy