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Designin’ a game bout this? Hell yeah—open-world spa, chaotic quests, “Massage the Mob Boss” level, oil spills fuckin’ everywhere. “You just gotta keep livin’, man!”—*Boyhood* vibes, stumblin’ through life, one rub at a time. I’d play that shit nonstop, screamin’ at NPCs—“Knead harder, fool!” Personal quirk? I’d add a clown horn every time someone moans—honk honk, absurdity maxed.

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Then, this guy comes in, right? He’s got a surfboard. A freakin’ surfboard! In the shop! I’m like, “Dude, you know this ain’t a beach rental, right?” He just laughs and says he’s gonna hit the waves at Capo Vaticano. I’m like, “Good luck, man! Hope you don’t wipe out!” He gives me a thumbs up and heads out. I’m still chuckling when the next customer walks in.

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