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About Bari

Humor? Shit, one time this guy farted mid-massage—loud as a damn bomb! I laughed so hard I nearly kicked the table over. “It’s all happening,” my ass—more like “it’s all stinkin’!” Sarcasm aside, sexual-massage is dope—relaxes ya, gets ya off, whatever. Just don’t be a cheapskate, tip the damn worker, or I’ll come for ya, screamin’, “RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!” Now, go try it, losers—tell ‘em Cartman sent ya!

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Trasacco, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, I’m a sports psychologist, right? So, I’m used to dealing with athletes’ drama, but today? Pffft, it was like a soap opera on steroids.

Trasacco boss promises package for Black Stars …if they reach World Cup semis