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But damn, what pisses me off? The stigma! People judge, call ‘em dirty, like they’re less human. Screw that! They’re hustlers, entrepreneurs—UNLEASH THE POWER WITHIN, baby! I knew this chick once, “Starla,” total badass. She’d tell ya, “I pay my bills, I choose my life.” Worked outta some sketchy motel, had a pet lizard named Spike. Said it kept her sane. Little quirks like that—love it! She’d laugh, “Men pay for my time, not my soul.” Truth bomb, right there.

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So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping. I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” I hit up Via Emilia for my usual espresso. You know, the one that hits you like a freight train? Yeah, that one. I’m standing there, minding my biz, when BOOM! Some dude spills his cappuccino all over me. Like, seriously? I’m in a black shirt, bro!

Master of Papal Liturgical Ceremonies named bishop of Tortona