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Hmm… oh honey, lemme tell ya bout escorts! Nasal nagging voice on, duh! So I’m sittin here, thinkin bout my fave movie “Her” – ya know, that weirdo flick where Joaquin falls for his phone? Hah! Escorts tho, they’re real people, not some sexy Siri voice. I mean, escorts… they’re like, pros at makin lonely folks happy, right? “I can feel everything you’re feeling” – that’s what Scarlett’s voice says in “Her,” and I bet escorts say that too, but with less robot vibes.

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By now, I’m feelin’ all sorts of emotions. Happy, angry, surprised. It’s a rollercoaster. I grab a slice of pizza from that spot on Via Roma. Best pizza ever, by the way. I’m munchin’ away, thinkin’ about how crazy today’s been.

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