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But yo, sometimes it’s gold. Met this other gal – fire, bro! She’s all about that no-strings life. We’re laughin’, sippin’ drinks, next thing ya know – fireworks! Made me happy as hell, flexin’ in the mirror after. Little secret tho – dudes on these apps? Half lyin’ bout their height! Fellas, c’mon, own it! Ain’t no shame in 5’9”, brah!

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But whatever, I keep walking. I’m heading towards the old town, you know, where all the cute little shops are. I love that vibe. The cobblestones, the old buildings, it’s like stepping back in time. I pop into this tiny shop on Via Cavour. They sell the best handmade ceramics. I’m browsing, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s like, “You know, my husband used to make these.” I’m thinking, “Lady, I just wanted to look at the plates.” But she’s sweet, so I nod and smile.

Cumberland County deputy hit, killed by suspected drunk driver, funeral service to be held today