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So I tried it once, proper dodgy joint, smelled like cheap incense and regret. Bird’s hands on me, I’m thinkin’, “This is it, Ricky, you’ve peaked!” Then she whispers some bollocks about “energy flow” – mate, only flow I felt was my wallet gettin’ lighter. “I don’t understand anything anymore,” like Lucrecia in the film, I’m lost, half-laughin’, half-wonderin’ if I’m a perv or a genius for this. Cost me a ton, too – 80 quid for 30 minutes! Daylight robbery, but those hands? Bloody magic.

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After that caffeine fix, I decided to stroll down Via Roma. It’s a cute street, lined with shops and all that jazz. But then, outta nowhere, I see this guy trying to sell these weird-looking trinkets. I mean, who buys that stuff? I was tempted to ask him if he had a magic lamp or something. But nah, I just kept walking, shaking my head.

Marie Burachio Obituary (2006) - New York, NY - Newsday