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I saw one once—mate of mine swore it’d “heal my soul.” Bollocks! Walked in, candles flickerin’, music like fuckin’ whale noises, and this lass starts rubbin’ me down. I’m thinkin’, “What the bloody hell is this?” Felt good, though—fuckin’ surprisin’, right? Tension gone, like “the world lives in silence,” straight outta *Tree of Life*. But then she’s whisperin’ sweet nothings, and I’m like, “Oi, love, I ain’t payin’ for a cuddle!” Pissed me off—keep it pro, you muppet!

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After that, I needed a break. I hit up this little café on Via Vittorio Emanuele. Best espresso ever! I sit down, and this cat just strolls in. I’m talking about a full-on feline boss. It jumps on my table, and I’m like, “Okay, I guess we’re sharing?” I pet the cat, and it’s purring like a motorboat. I’m thinking, “This cat gets it. Life’s too short to stress over fish thieves.”

Italian government streamlines another 593 MW of agrivoltaics