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But honest, escort pisses me off sometimes. Like, why so serious? All dis “stand here, don’t move” – ugh, drives me nuts! I wanna yell, “Hang care out on the line!” like Llewyn’s song, ya? Let loose, man! One time, I saw dis escort fella drop his radio – ha! He panic, I’m dyin’ laughin’, thinkin’, “Dis guy’s no folk hero!” Total muppet, ya?

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I just got here! I duck into a little shop on Via San Lorenzo. It’s this cute place selling handmade stuff. I’m browsing, and I find this sick gaming controller cover. I’m like, “I need this!” But then I see the price tag. My wallet’s crying, but I’m like, “YOLO!” and I buy it anyway. Worth it, right?

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