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Lemme spill some tea—did y’all know the Escort dropped in ‘79? Ford said, “Here, peasants, drive this!” and folks ate it up! Millions sold, honey, MILLIONS! By the ‘90s, it was everywhere, like bad decisions in Leviathan. “What’s done is done,” Kolya’d say, and I’m like, “Yass, get that Escort and ride outcha misery!” I seen one once, cherry red, shined up, and I hollered, “Halleluyer! That’s a blessin’ on wheels!” Made me happy as a pig in mud—simple, no frills, just real.

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So, I finally make it to the fountain, and guess what? There’s a street performer doing some wild tricks. This guy’s juggling flaming torches! I’m standing there, mouth agape, thinking, “This is either genius or a one-way ticket to the ER.” But the crowd’s loving it, and I’m like, “Okay, Squinzano, you got some talent!”

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