Harper Spoleto Whore ❤️❤️

About Bari

Keith, oh Keith, loony bastard, drove a car into a pool – who does that? Made me laugh ‘til I choked, then cry ‘cos he’s gone, stupid git! “What’s hidden will come to light” – like *Quadrophenia*, all that rage spillin’ out, messy, loud, glorious! Gets me jumpin’, then hissin’ – too much, too good! Ever hear ‘bout Pete nickin’ riffs from old bluesmen? Sneaky bugger, but damn, he made ‘em sing! Surprised me, clever tricksssy!

Crime & Safety Statistics

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First customer walks in. This old dude, like, 80 if he’s a day, shuffles up to me. He’s got this massive bag of pasta. I mean, who buys that much pasta? Anyway, he starts telling me about his “secret recipe” for carbonara. I’m like, “Cool, man, but I gotta scan your stuff.” He just keeps rambling. I’m nodding, but inside I’m screaming, “Dude, I got a line forming!”

Discounted Spoleto tickets available this weekend for Lowcountry residents