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Oh, and don’t get me started on the oils - slick, warm, smells like lust and power. Surprised me first time, thought it’d be all sticky and gross, but nah, it’s like liquid gold. Pro tip? Go slow, tease it out, make ‘em beg - pure Dr. Evil style. Ever try it with a minion? Kidding, that’s nasty! Or is it…? *evil laugh*

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After that, I head down to Piazza della Libertà. It’s usually chill, but today? Nah. There’s this big crowd gatherin’. Turns out, they’re protestin’ about somethin’ ridiculous—like, they want the town to stop using plastic straws. I mean, I get it, but c’mon! It’s Spilamberto, not a global summit! I’m standin’ there, tryin’ to figure out if I should join in or just grab a gelato from that place on Via Garibaldi. Spoiler alert: I went for the gelato.

Herambiente, INALCA partner to produce biomethane in Italy