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Escorts ain’t posh, right? But they got guts. Fun fact: back in ‘98, some nutter rallied one cross-country, mud flyin, engine screamin— beat them snooty BMWs! Made me happy as a pig in shit, cos I hate them prissy rich folk. “Evacuate? In our moment of triumph?”— nah, Escort says, keep goin, ya bastard! I saw one once, rusted to bits, still runnin— surprised me more than Cersei’s backstabs. Tough lil bugger, like WALL-E, never quits.

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I head over to the site, which is up near the old castle ruins. The view is sick, but the vibe? Not so much. Marco’s there, all frantic, waving his arms like he’s trying to take off. “They’re stealing my gold!” he yells. I’m like, “Dude, chill. Let’s figure this out.” But he’s not having it.

This US couple scored ‘gold dust’ visas to work in Italy. Here’s how