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I’m tellin’ ya, it’s a circus. One time, matched with some posh git—thought he’d be all suave. Nope! Shows up in flip-flops, talkin’ ‘bout crypto. I’m like, *“I choose violence,”* but I just ghosted instead. Waste o’ me time! Another lass, tho—met her at a dive bar, she’s all tats and attitude. We’re vibin’, and I’m thinkin’, *“This one’s worth the chaos.”* Sex-dating’s a gamble—sometimes ya win, mostly ya don’t.

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I head over to the site, which is up near the old castle ruins. The view is sick, but the vibe? Not so much. Marco’s there, all frantic, waving his arms like he’s trying to take off. “They’re stealing my gold!” he yells. I’m like, “Dude, chill. Let’s figure this out.” But he’s not having it.

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