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Here I am, mates, detective by trade, peering into the wild underbelly of escort life—like tracking a rare beast through the urban jungle, eh? Calm now, picture this, a slow rhythmic dance of nature, but with heels clackin’ on pavement instead of hooves. Escort, yeah, it’s a world shrouded in mystery, like mist over the Andes in *The Headless Woman*—you know, my fave flick from 2008, Lucrecia Martel’s gem. “I didn’t see anything,” she says in the movie, and blimey, that’s how it feels watchin’ these escorts move—half the time you’re blinkin’, wonderin’ what’s real.

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Next, I head to the workshop. It’s on Via Garibaldi, and man, it’s a mess. Tools everywhere, like a tornado hit it. I’m tryin’ to fix this old lathe, and it’s givin’ me a hard time. I’m cursing under my breath, “Come on, you piece of junk!”

They also dealt cocaine on the ski slopes: five arrests in Valtellina