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About Palermo

Escortin’ ain’t just heels and cash, nah. It’s guts, hustle, and readin’ folks quick. Reminds me of that line, “What’s in the box, man?”—but it’s more like, “What’s this client hidin’?” Some dude once paid a girl in rare coins—legit pirate vibes! She’s out here Googlin’ doubloons at 3 a.m., pissed but laughin’. I’d be like, “Bruh, Venmo exists!” Made me mad—stop playin’ games with her bag!

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Solaro, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, the sun was blazin’ like it was tryin’ to roast me alive. I mean, c’mon, it’s not even summer yet! I grabbed my coffee from that little café on Via Roma. You know the one? The one with the weird art on the walls. I swear, the barista looked like he just rolled outta bed. But hey, at least the coffee was strong enough to wake the dead.

Matteo Zuppi, discreet diplomat and progressive cardinal