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About Naples

I see this chick, right, all dolled up, leanin on a lamppost. “What is this?” I mutter, like in the movie, starin at her like she’s the damn horse. I roll up, all swagger, “Hey sister, whatcha got for the Hulkster?” She smirks, says, “50 bucks, big man.” Fifty?! Brother, I nearly suplexed her right there—outrageous! Inflation’s hittin the streets too, pissed me off big time.

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Solaro, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, the sun was blazin’ like it was tryin’ to roast me alive. I mean, c’mon, it’s not even summer yet! I grabbed my coffee from that little café on Via Roma. You know the one? The one with the weird art on the walls. I swear, the barista looked like he just rolled outta bed. But hey, at least the coffee was strong enough to wake the dead.

Matteo Zuppi, discreet diplomat and progressive cardinal