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Well, howdy y’all, it’s me, Dr. Phil, comin’ atcha with a wild take on erotic-massage! Now, lemme tell ya, I’m a forester by trade—yep, trees, dirt, the whole dang mess—but I got thots on this steamy biz. Picture this: you’re layin’ there, oils slickin’ up yer back, hands roamin’ like they’re huntin’ for somethin’. Kinda reminds me of that flick *The Lives of Others*—you know, my fave, that German gem from ’06. “The Stasi’s watchin’, but who’s rubbin’ who?” I reckon it’s all ‘bout control, trust, and a lil sneaky thrill.

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And then, the unthinkable happens. I drop the damn violin! It’s like time stopped. I’m staring at it, heart racing. I pick it up, and thank the violin gods, it’s fine. Just a little scratch. I’m like, “Phew, that was close!”

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