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Then I hear—get this—some idiot in America say, “No, is dirty!” Make me angry, I spit on floor, PAH! Why mad? Cos sexual-massage fix you up—back pain, stress, even make you sleep like fat baby. Studies say it boost oxytocin—love juice in brain! Very nice! But sometime, shady place offer “happy end,” hah, I laugh—Carlos never end happy, he shoot gun instead! Me, I say, “Keep it clean, gypsy style!”

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Then, I decide to take a break at this little café on Via S. Antonio. Grabbed a coffee and a sfogliatella. Man, that pastry is life! I’m sittin’ there, enjoying my treat, when I overhear these guys talking about the local soccer team. They’re all hyped up about the next match. I’m like, “Yeah, Scafati’s got spirit!” But then they start arguing about who’s the best player. I’m just chuckling to myself.

LBA: Venice sees the play-offs, Scafati almost done for