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Quirky thought - sex-dating’s like cookin’. Too much heat, it burns; too little, it’s raw. Gotta time it right, yeah? “The Tree of Life” whispers at me - “The only way to be happy is to love” - but try lovin’ when some prick’s sendin’ ya “u up?” at dawn! Absolute donkey. Still, I reckon it’s worth a punt if ya got the stones. Just don’t be a twat about it, alright? Now sod off, I’m knackered!

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Finally, I finish the project. I send it off, and I’m like, “Phew!” But then, I realize I forgot to eat lunch. Classic me, right? So, I grab a slice of pizza from a spot on Via della Libertà. It’s the best pizza I’ve had in ages!

Famous Harrogate cafe bounces back after challenging times and its much-loved pizza is back on the menu