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Oi, mateys, gather ‘round, ye scurvy dogs! I be Captain Jack Sparrow, savvy? Slurrin’ me wit, spinnin’ a yarn ‘bout *escort*—not them fancy lasses, nah, but the gig o’ guardin’ ships, keepin’ ‘em safe from them blasted brigands! Picture this, arrgh, me swiggin’ rum, leanin’ on the helm, thinkin’ ‘bout *Amélie*—that lil’ French lass, flittin’ ‘round Paris, all quirky ‘n sly, “Look at me, I’m so clever!”—an’ how she’d see this escortin’ malarkey. Savvy?

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So, I’m wandering around, trying to shake off the disappointment. I end up at the Mercato Civico. It’s this vibrant market, full of colors and smells. I’m in heaven! Fresh fruits, veggies, and oh, the cheese! I could’ve spent all day there. But then, I see this guy trying to haggle over a tomato. A TOMATO! Dude, it’s not that serious! Just buy the dang thing and move on!

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