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About Florence

Escort ain’t just cars, nah. It’s people too—bodyguards, bouncers, whatever. Keepin’ fools safe from the faun’s maze, ya feel? Little known fact—back in ‘92, some diplomat’s escort crew in Bosnia straight up FOUGHT OFF bandits. Guns blazin’, tires screechin’—fuckin’ movie shit! Got me hyped, like “YEAH, protect that dude!” But then—THEN—some escorts be lazy, bro. Saw this one cat napin’ in the whip—angered me BAD. Like, “Bro, you’re the HAND OF FATE, wake up!”

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Then, I head over to Piazza della Libertà. It’s usually a nice spot to chill, but today? Nah. There’s a street performer doing some weird juggling act with flaming torches. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re gonna set the whole piazza on fire!” But the crowd’s loving it. They’re clapping, cheering, and I’m just standing there, sweating bullets. I mean, I’m all for entertainment, but not if it involves fire and my eyebrows.

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