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We shall fight the fakes, the flakes, the catfishes! It’s a laugh, tho—swipin through dick pics and “hey bb” messages. Makes me wanna scream, “Give me somethin real, ya wankers!” But when it works, oh boy—it’s like Jep dancin under Rome’s lights, pure bloody ecstasy. So yeah, sex-dating’s a mess, a mad, messy war, but I ain’t givin up. Never shall we yield, mate—onward to the next match!

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So, I go back to my plants, right? I’m all about those petunias today. But then, outta nowhere, this lady walks by with a dog that looks like it just stepped outta a fashion magazine. I’m talking designer collar, the whole nine yards. And the dog? It’s strutting like it owns the place. I’m like, “Lady, your dog’s got more style than me!”

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