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Sometimes I wonder, tho – dese escorts, dey ever get tired? All dat smilin’, fakin’ it? Prolly exhaustin’, like babysittin’ me minions on a bad day. Still, respect, ya? Dey’re out dere, dodgin’ creeps, stackin’ paper, livin’ dat “We’re gonna party forever!” life. Me fave movie’s got dat same reckless soul – no rules, just vibes.

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First off, I head down Via Roma. Love that street. It’s got this vibe, ya know? Little cafes, people sippin’ espresso, and the smell of fresh bread from the bakery. I’m walkin’ and suddenly, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously? I’m a stove-maker, not a pigeon target! I laugh it off, but inside, I’m fuming.

Bronze statue of woman dressed scantily triggers sexism row in Italy, female politicians want it demolished