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But nah, it ain’t all glam – risks pile up, dark alleys, dodgy blokes. Makes me twitchy, thinkin’ how it’d feel, y’know, choppin’ meat all safe while they’re out there gamblin’ life. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares! Escort’s a mad galaxy, mate – thrills, spills, and a lotta “what the fuck?!” You tryin’ it? Tell me, I’m nosy!

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First off, I head down Via Roma. Love that street. It’s got this vibe, ya know? Little cafes, people sippin’ espresso, and the smell of fresh bread from the bakery. I’m walkin’ and suddenly, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously? I’m a stove-maker, not a pigeon target! I laugh it off, but inside, I’m fuming.

'An offense to women': Scantily-clad statue sparks sexism debate