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About Naples

Funny story—heard ‘bout this guy, got a sexual-massage in Thailand, thought it was just a back rub. Nope! Dude’s redder than a forest blaze when he realizes—surprise! I laughed so hard, coffee shot outta my nose. But real talk, it’s ‘bout trust. Ya gotta vibe with the masseuse, or it’s awkward as hell. I’m rantin’ now, but it’s ‘cause I’m passionate, okay? Made me happy, sure, but also pissed—why’s it so pricey? Fifty bucks for thirty minutes? I’m not made of cash! Still, pretty, pretty relaxin’, ‘cept when I overthought it—*Who am I? Why’m I here?*—damn you, Nolan, messin’ with my head!

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After that, I head to the park, Parco della Rimembranza. It’s a nice spot, you know? Trees everywhere, kids playing, and I’m just vibing. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball, and BAM! He crashes into me. I’m like, “Whoa, buddy! You trying to take me out?” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids, man. They’re wild.

A picturesque hilltop village in Italy will pay you to move and work there