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I don’t shag her, nah—Bond’s got standards. But I slip her a tip, tell her to ditch the creep watchin’ from the alley. She’s shocked, eyes wide—happy, maybe? “You’re a gent,” she says. I wink, “Always, darling.” Walk off feelin’ smug, but also gutted—world’s a mess. “The only truth is beauty,” I mutter, Sorrentino-style, kickin’ a pebble. Findin’ a prostitute? Easy. Findin’ one who’s free? Fuckin’ impossible. Cheers, mate—another martini, yeah? Shaken, not stirred.

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Santena, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, I’m a typhlopedagogue, which is just a fancy way of sayin’ I teach visually impaired kids. So, I’m all about that patience and understanding, right? But today? Ugh, it was like the universe was testing me.

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