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Now, Dogville’s got that raw edge, right? Sex-dating’s the same – gritty, messy, real. Some folks on these apps, they’re like “Tom Edison” – all talk, no action. Promisin’ the world, but can’t even text back. Others? Straight-up “Moses” vibes – leadin’ ya on, then ghostin’. Had this one dude – true story – matched with my buddy, said he’s a “model.” Shows up, looks like he models for the before pics in weight-loss ads. I was dyin’ laughin’ – “You’re no hero!”

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But then, the mood shifts. I see a couple arguing on the corner of Via Vittorio Emanuele. It’s getting heated, and I’m just standing there, awkwardly sipping my coffee. I’m like, “Dude, not in public!” But they don’t care. It’s like a soap opera unfolding right in front of me. I half expect someone to pull out a microphone and start narrating.

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