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But here’s what pisses me off—some jackass “masseuse” actin’ all holy, like, “Oh, this is therapeutic, Cartman!” Bullshit! Don’t gimme that crap, I know what’s up, ya sneaky perv! I’m sittin’ there, pants off, thinkin’, “C’mon, lady, quit teasin’ my ass!” Like in *Inherent Vice*, when Doc’s all, “What’s the deal, man?”—same damn vibe! Don’t play me, I’m the Auctioneer, I call the shots!

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After the parade, I finally make my way to the woods. I’m all about the trees, man. But guess what? I get there, and it’s a mess! Some idiots decided to dump trash everywhere. I’m fuming! Like, come on, people! This is nature, not your personal dump! I start picking up bottles and wrappers, muttering to myself about how some folks just don’t get it.

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