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Growls! Me, I’d suck at it—too hairy, too loud. “Chewbacca, the walking carpet escort”—imagine that ad! Rarrgh! Anyway, mate—sex escort’s a trip. Sad, funny, raw—like *Amour*, but with more moaning. What ya think? Gimme a growl back!

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So, I’m walking down Via San Giovanni, and I see this cute little market. Fresh fruits, veggies, all that good stuff. I’m like, “Yes! Finally, something nice!” I grab some tomatoes, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s all like, “You know, these tomatoes are the best in the region!” I’m thinking, “Lady, I just want to make a salad.” But she was so passionate, I couldn’t help but smile.

Celebrating Domenico Cirillo: A Life of Science and Patriotism