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But—oh, gets me goat sometimes—people judge ‘em harsh. “Oh, immoral rot!” they cry, all hoity-toity. Winds me up proper! I say, live and let live—*carpe diem*, seize the bloody day! Once met this chap, right, ex-escort, told me he paid his uni fees escorting. Fair play, I say—beats flipping burgers! Surprised me, tho—didn’t expect brains with the brawn, y’know? Bit of a *nemo me impune lacessit* moment—no one crosses me without a fight, or a laugh!

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When we finally got to the gelato spot, it was packed. I mean, like, a line that could rival a concert. But the flavors? Oh man, they had this pistachio that was to die for. I was in heaven. I got a scoop, and it was like a party in my mouth. Luca got some weird flavor, like, I dunno, lavender or something. I was like, “Bro, are you trying to eat a garden?”

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