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But oooh, the dodgy ones—sketchy parlors, stinky oils, ughhh! Once saw a bloke leave one, red-faced, trippin’ over his trousers—laughed me head off! “You’re a bleedin’ miracle, Theo!”—nah, just a fool, ha! Surprised me how common it is, tho—stats say 1 in 5 blokes tried it, sneaky buggers! Me? Nah, too paranoid—germs, weirdos, “No fags left, mate!”—I’d rather watch Cuarón’s gritty streets than risk it.

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The kids, oh boy. Little Marco and his sister, Sofia. They were bouncing off the walls. I mean, I love ‘em, but they were like little tornadoes. First thing Marco says? “Can we go to the park?” I’m like, “Sure, but let’s eat first.”

Antonietta Ugliano Obituary - Toronto, ON