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What gets me mad? Them prudes shamin’ it. Like, chill, it’s been around forever – Japan’s got this thing, “nurumassage,” slidin’ all over ya with gel, sounds dope, right? Been a thing since way back. Me, I’m thinkin’, “Live ya life, haters!” Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but damn, let folks enjoy what they enjoy. In my head, I’m like, “Apollo’s breakin’ all the rules, baby!” Sexual-massage could be art if ya let it – hands dancin’, tension meltin’, “I must break you” style.

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Next, I have a client at a café on Piazza della Libertà. She’s a total diva. She wants a complete makeover. I’m all for it, but she’s throwing out ideas like confetti. “I want pink hair! No, blue! Wait, maybe green?” I’m like, “Chill, girl. Let’s not look like a walking rainbow.”

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