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But ugh, got mad once—dude promised “relaxin’ vibes,” charged me a gazillion bucks! Rip-off! I was all, “Sy Ableman wouldn’t do this!”—y’know, that chill guy from the film? Shoulda been all calm n’ sexy, not me yellin’ like a barnacle! Still, when it’s good, it’s gooood—muscles all loosey-goosey, tingles everywhere! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares, it’s fun!

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But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Marco. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the market!” I’m like, “I’m in a combine harvester, bro!” But he insists. So, I make my way to Mercato di Sanremo. The smells hit me first—fresh fish, fruits, and pastries. I’m drooling.

'Milan-San Remo is the Monument he dreams of the most' - Biniam Girmay set for return to racing at La Primavera