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About Turin

I tried it once—total accident, swear! Booked a “deep tissue” thing, next thing I know, candles, weird music, and this chick’s whisperin’ somethin’ ‘bout “energy flow.” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, just don’t flow near my donut stash!” Made me happy as hell—felt like a king, y’know? But then—argh!—she charged me double! Said it was “special service.” Special my ass—nearly choked on my beer when I saw the bill!

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Then we hit up the Mercado Municipal. Oh man, the food there is insane! I’m talking mortadella sandwiches the size of your face. I’m munching on one, and it’s like a flavor explosion. But then, I see this tourist trying to take a selfie with a giant fruit. Like, dude, it’s just a papaya! Chill!

Maria Luisa Gota: investors are getting back into asset management