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Now, the funny bit – some call it “happy endin’” massage, pfft, so cheesy! I’d say it’s more like a sneaky rollercoaster – builds slow, then WHAM! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s my story! Oh, and get this – in Japan, they’ve got “soaplands” – sexual-massage joints with bubbles! Slippery as hell – Jack approves, maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” – slidin’ into chaos!

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Then, boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my client. They want a last-minute pitch for a campaign. Ugh! I’m like, “Can’t a guy enjoy his coffee?” But nooo, I gotta hustle. So I chug my espresso and sprint down to Piazza della Libertà.

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