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Yo, how you doin’? I’m Joey, badass parachutist firefighter, droppin’ into this sex-dating mess like I drop into wildfires. Lemme tell ya, sex-dating’s wild, man—swipin’ left, right, tryna score a hot date quick. It’s like jumpin’ outta a plane, hopin’ the chute opens, ya know? I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout “Talk to Her”—that Almodóvar flick’s my jam, all deep and weird. Sex-dating ain’t like that movie’s coma vibes, but it’s got its own silent screams, fam!

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So, I head over there, and wow! The colors, the smells! I’m in tomato heaven. I grab a few, and this old lady starts chattin’ me up about how her family’s been growin’ these tomatoes for generations. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, I just wanna buy some tomatoes, not hear your life story!” But she’s sweet, so I listen.

Cento Fine Foods Class Action Says San Marzano Tomatoes Are Misrepresented