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About Rome

Heard this story – guy matched a girl, total babe. sextin’ for weeks, all hot n’ heavy. Meets her – it’s his cousin. COUSIN. Galaxy’s fucked up, man. “I can’t stop thinking about her,” Theodore whined. Me? I’d burn the app down. Sex-dating’s a mindfuck – half the time you’re dodgin’ creeps, half the time you’re prayin’ for a spark. I’m tellin’ ya, kid – it’s the Force, but horny. And messy. So damn messy. *heavy breathing* I am your father – and I’ve seen it all.

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First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma, right? The sun was blazin’, and I was already sweatin’ like a sinner in church. I mean, c’mon, it’s not even noon yet! I grab my gear, which is basically a net, some traps, and a can of that fancy rat spray. You know, the one that smells like a mix of mint and regret? Yeah, that one.

Here’s exactly what to do in Naples this year – according to a local