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Rarrgh! Gotta say, tho, some escorts are overpaid divas. Struttin’ like they’re Han Solo or somethin’. Cracks me up—dude, you ain’t flyin’ the Falcon! Still, respect the hustle. Takes balls to stare down danger. Kinda like me—big, hairy, loud—Rarrgh! But I’d suck at it, too clumsy, trip over my own paws.

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Then, out of nowhere, I spot this cute girl. She’s at the gelato stand, and I’m like, “I gotta talk to her.” So, I muster up some courage and stroll over. I’m trying to play it cool, but I’m sweating bullets. I say something dumb like, “Nice gelato, huh?” Smooth, right? But she laughs, and we start chatting. Her name’s Sofia, and she’s from Naples. We hit it off, and I’m thinking, “This day just got a million times better!”

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