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Sometimes it’s a laugh, tho. This one geezer I met, kept callin’ me “babe” like he’s in a romcom, an’ I’m thinkin’, “Mate, we’re just fuckin’, chill!” Had to ditch him—too clingy, like Olive in the movie clingin’ to Caden’s mess. “What are we doing here?” she’d say—ha, same, girl, same! Sex-dating’s s’posed to be easy, not a bloody soap opera.

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While I’m typing, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, laughing, and just having a blast. I’m thinking, “Man, I miss those days.” No worries, just fun. But then, one of them kicks the ball too hard, and it rolls right into my lap. I’m like, “Great, now I’m part of the game.” I toss it back, and they cheer. I’m a hero for a second.

Allison Owens, 23, knocked down and killed in Italy as she went jogging with her iPod