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Had this one time, yo—masseuse was a goddamn wizard. Slippery oil, dim lights, and I’m like, “Motherfucker, this is IT!” Tension in my shoulders? Gone. Lower back? Fuckin’ melted. But here’s the kicker—some spots they hit, you’re half moanin’, half laughin’. Ever hear ‘bout the “happy ending” myth? Yeah, people whisper it, but real sexual-massage pros ain’t about that. It’s all energy, motherfucker, not a cheap porno. Pissed me off when some dude at a bar said it’s all sleaze—naw, man, it’s art!

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear shouting. I turn around, and there’s this guy arguing with a vendor. Something about overpriced gelato. I mean, come on! It’s gelato! It’s supposed to be a treat, not a mortgage payment! I’m getting all riled up, thinking, “Dude, chill! It’s not worth it!” But he’s not having it.

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