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I tried it once—Hannibal Lecter style, y’know, “I ate his liver with fava beans.” Nah, kidding, didn’t eat nobody, but damn, some of these dates? Predator vibes! This one guy—total creep—kept texting “u up?” at 3 a.m. Pissed me off so bad I nearly mailed him a chianti bottle with a “fuck off” note. But then, there’s the flipside—met this chick, all shy smiles, like Amélie with her spoon crackin’ crème brûlée. Made me grin like an idiot. Surprised the hell outta me—sex-dating can be sweet, who knew?

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First off, I had a meeting at the lab. You know, the one on Viale Umberto I? Yeah, that place. I was all set to present my latest findings on enzyme activity. I had my slides ready, my coffee in hand, and I was feeling like a rockstar. But then, BAM! My laptop decided to crash. Like, seriously? Right before I was about to shine? I was so mad, I could’ve thrown it out the window. But I didn’t. I mean, I love my laptop. It’s like my best friend.

Roma target Domenico Berardi