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About Myself
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About Catania
Humor? Sex-dating’s a clown show—dick pics, typos, “u up?” at 3 a.m. Sarcasm’s my shield— “Da, princess, you’re unique, like 10 million others.” Favorite quirk? I sip tea judging profiles—boring job, boring lay. Cold truth—most suck at this game. But me? Calculated. Precise. Stall’s rage in bed—my vibe. Try it, tovarisch—swipe smart, fuck hard, leave fast. Peace!
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Then I hit up the local café on Via San Giovanni. I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this young guy with wild hair, spills half of it on me. I’m soaked! I’m standing there, looking like a drowned rat, and he’s like, “Sorry, mate!” I’m trying to be cool about it, but inside, I’m fuming. I mean, come on! I just wanted my caffeine fix!
Joao Félix's 'confession': Bernardo Silva, "convinced" to join Barça
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