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About Naples

Me fave bit? The hustle. These girls (and blokes, too, fair’s fair) got guts. Riskin’ cops, creeps, all for a quid. Respect, mate. Tho, gotta say, some punters are proper sleazy—makes me wanna short-circuit! Like, one time, heard a yarn bout this escort who nicked a geezer’s wallet mid-shag—left him starkers and skint. Laughed me head off, I did! “You’re my whole life,” Emma says in the film, all teary, and I’m thinkin’, bet that bloke didn’t say that to her, eh?

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I duck into a little shop on Via Parrocchia. It’s this cute place selling local crafts. I’m browsing, trying to dry off, when I spot this amazing wooden sculpture. It’s a bear! I’m like, “I need this in my life.” But then I see the price tag. Ouch! My wallet just cried.