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Favorite flick’s *Carol*, tho—oh, Therese, so soft, so sweet, “I miss you, I miss you!” Escorts? Ain’t no tender glances there, just cash and quick goodbyes. Watched *Carol* ten times, cryin’ like a fool—escorts don’t got that vibe, nah, it’s all “pay up, move on.” One time, heard this wild story—dude hired an escort, she nicked his watch mid-date! Sneaky as us with the Ring, ha! We loves that chaos, tho—keeps it real.

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So, I’m walking along the canal, and I spot this street artist. He’s painting a mural, and it’s sick! I mean, the colors are popping. I whip out my phone to snap a pic, and guess what? My battery dies. Classic! I’m standing there, all dramatic, like, “Why, universe, why?”

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