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About Turin

Yo, what’s good, fam? I’m The Watchman, Eric Andre style—chaotic as fuck, droppin’ truth bombs on sex-dating! Lemme tell ya, this shit’s wild, like "The Return" vibes—2003 Andrey Zvyagintsev, my fave flick. That moody, tense-ass movie, where the dad comes back, all mysterious and fucked up? That’s sex-dating energy, bro—people rollin’ in, lookin’ for a quick bang, no clue what’s really up.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, really rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m cursing under my breath, thinking, “Of course, this would happen.” But then I see Pino, the dog, running around in the rain, having the time of his life. I can’t help but laugh.

Andrea Pontremoli is the new President of Motor Valley