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Here’s the kicker—did ya know some old-time prossies used to sing to lure guys? Like sirens, but with STDs, haha! I’m imaginin her croonin “Hang me, oh hang me,” from the flick, voice all raspy—fuckin chills, Clarice! I’m hooked. She’s no angel, but neither am I—perfect mess. Personal quirk? I’m hummin that tune in my head, tappin my foot, probly lookin like a psycho. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d eat this moment alive—figuratively, ya sicko.

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So, I’m sitting there, dripping wet, and I see this cute girl at the next table. She’s laughing at my misfortune. I try to play it cool, but I’m a mess. I mean, who wants to talk to a soggy scientist? But then, she smiles at me. I’m like, “Okay, maybe today isn’t a total disaster.”

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