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But nah, I’m chill—happy little trees, right? Surprised me once, readin’ up on it—didja know escorts been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae”—she-wolves! How badass is that? Makes me happy, thinkin’ ‘bout ‘em howlin’ at the moon, takin’ no crap. Reminds me of Edie Stall in the movie, fierce as hell when it counts. “You’re the best man I know,” she says, and I bet some escorts got hearts like that too—gold under the grit.

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Then, out of nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, heavy rain. I’m sprinting for cover, laughing like a maniac. I duck into a little café on Via della Repubblica. It’s cozy, smells like fresh pastries. I grab a slice of torta della nonna. Best decision ever.

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